What I Didn’t Understand About My Mom Until I Had Kids
I never thought about my Mom being lonely.
Not really.
She was just… Mom.
She was the one who answered every call. The one who showed up. The
one who held everything together, even when no one noticed.
I didn’t think about her as a person outside of being my Mom.
I didn’t think about what it cost her.
I didn’t think about what it felt like when the house got quiet.
I didn’t think about her loneliness.
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Not until I became a Mom myself.
When you have kids, your life becomes full overnight.
Full of noise. Full of responsibility. Full of love.
But also full of moments where you feel completely alone.
There were nights I sat on the edge of my bed after finally getting my
baby to sleep, exhausted in a way I had never known before. My body
tired. My mind racing. My heart heavy.
And there was no one there to see it.
No one there to carry the weight with me.
That’s when I started to understand her.
Not as my Mom.
But as a Mother.
I started remembering things differently.
The way she would sit quietly sometimes.
The way she didn’t always talk about how she felt.
The way she carried everything without asking for anything in return.
I realized she had lived this life before me.
She had felt the same exhaustion.
The same responsibility.
The same quiet loneliness that comes with being the one everyone depends on.
And she carried it without ever making it our burden.
She protected us from it.
She loved us through it.
I called her a lot during those early years.
Sometimes crying. Sometimes overwhelmed. Sometimes just needing
someone to tell me I was going to be okay.
She always answered.
Always.
Not with judgment.
Not with criticism.
Just love.
Just calm.
Just her steady voice reminding me I could do this.
She had been there before.
She knew the road.
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Motherhood didn’t just change me.
It changed how I saw her.
I stopped seeing her as someone who just raised me.
I started seeing her as someone who sacrificed for me.
Someone who carried more than I ever realized.
Someone who loved me through stages of my life when I didn’t always
understand her.
There are so many things I wish I could go back and tell her.
I’m sorry for the times I didn’t see you.
I’m sorry for the times I didn’t understand.
I’m sorry for thinking you were just Mom and not realizing you were
also a woman carrying the weight of loving us.
Now I see it.
Now I understand it.
Now I live it.
If you’re a Daughter reading this….
One day you will understand your Mom in a way you never could before.
“Don’t give up on each other. The hard seasons don’t last forever. My Mom is now my best friend — and I’m so grateful we kept choosing each other.”
– Lauren –
And if you’re a Mom reading this, just know this…
She may not see it yet.
But one day, she will.
I promise.
With So Much Love,
